The Cabbage Patch

Life Story

I have several places online where my life story is told.  They're all in bits and pieces and for the most part not well written.  Writing is not my forte and never has been.  Give me a good old math problem to solve and I'm happiest.  

I am an open book.  On Facebook, I put out most of my business.  It's quick and easy.  And, (I'm about to get morbid and sad) I know I won't be around for a lot of time.  I'm hoping and praying for many, many years but you know, metastatic cancer.  Anyway, I have hopes that in the future when I am gone, my children will look at memories from Facebook and smile at them.  Even the bad ones.  I hope they see the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful that was our lives together.  I hope they remember them and know "wow, it sucked during that time, but man, we sure came out stronger".  Or, "wow, we had such a good time then".  I hate that my openness has allowed people to steal some of the peace I had been feeling.  I trusted that people who I thought were friends would be able to keep my stuff to themselves.  Turns out I was wrong.  I went and restricted any and everyone except for a couple of people who might know me in real life and know the people who have given me grief this past year.  

I don't write this to make anyone sad.  Don't be!  Life is good.  Not yet very peaceful but man, it's good.  

I'm going to take a break from social media.  For now.  I don't know how long.  I just know that I need to take a break.  It's hard because it's my go to whenever I'm waiting somewhere and I do a LOT of waiting.  Know that I'm praying for you and will probably update via this blog.  I hope.  

And, because I always like to add photos to my blog, here's one:

New Year, New Us

We have quite a few changes in our lives this academic year:

• Michaela starts college at the local community college and it's paid for.  Woohoo!
• Jordan starts somewhere new for ballet.  I'm keeping the details of this one close.
• Emma starts dual credit math classes.
• I have a freshman and junior in high school.  ONLY TWO homeschoolers!
• I'm helping out in a big capacity with our parish youth group.  I'm playing an even bigger role than in the past.  Mostly, it'll be admin stuff but I'm excited for what the year will bring.
• I'm shooting a wedding with Emma is my second shooter.  I'm nervous and excited.

We had to say goodbye to our beloved ballet instructor and friend as the Army sent them far away from us.  Luckily, they're still within road trip distance (although really no one is ever outside of road trip distance for us).

As school starts up again for y'all, I pray for a fruitful year, one of prayer and peace.

My Story

Everyone has a story.  This blog is MY story.  Not anyone else's.  It's my space where I put down the happenings in my life, good or bad.  My story doesn't mean someone else's story is not true.  Just because I had a bad experience doesn't mean you did.  It means we had a bad experience.  You and I could go to the same restaurant and order the same food, and we could end up with different opinions on what we experienced.  Why?  There are myriad reasons.  My bad restaurant experience doesn't invalidate your good restaurant experience.  Yes, we had a very bad experience the fall semester at TMB.  No, you didn't.  That's okay.  It doesn't make mine or my children's any less bad.  It was hell.  But, this is the last I'll speak of it and TMB.  

Now, I've restricted several people on Facebook.  I don't want them taking my things and giving screen shots to people.  If you are reading this, are my Facebook friend, are not restricted, and are sending this link to people to stir things up, please go unfriend yourself.  You're not being a friend.  

The rest of the story...we are on a road trip and are having a blast.  We're on day 3.  I'll try to blog more about our trip in the next couple of days.  In the meantime, here's a photo of my girls and some of the friends they were reunited with.

Musings on Friendship

Look at this, two blog posts in a week.  

I've been pondering friendship lately.  I often do as my friend circle evolves and changes all the time.  I have a lot of acquaintances, but not a lot of friends.  It's changed because I used to have a lot more friends.  I don't want pity I'm just talking.  I made a decision a few years ago to circle my wagons and make that circle super small.  I'd been hurt by people who I thought were my friends.  They assumed things about me and did not come to ask me.  It was hard.

My children also have had these things happen and I wonder about friendship a lot.  What makes a good friend?  A friend is one who asks how you're doing.  A friend is happy for you in the good times and supports you in the bad.  It can even only be a text.  Of course, there are different levels of friendship, but this is basically it.

We've lost a lot of friends over the years and some because we knew why and some we had no idea about.  The only thing I hope for is that the friends who are no longer friends don't pervert the memories of our friendships.  What do I mean?  That they don't talk with their friends about us.  That we, either me, or any of my girls, don't become the subject of their gossip.  I hope they say, yeah, we were friends, but we aren't any longer.  It was good while it lasted but we drifted apart.  Or if there was a major event to cause the rift that they say, yes, we're no longer friends and leave it at that.  

I do grieve the loss of each and every friendship.  Except for one person (I'm working super hard on this and pray about it all the time), I try to look at the good side of things, the happy memories.  

I leave you with a picture because I like pictures in my blog post.  Michaela has been friends with Nathaniel (kid on the right) since 2005.  

 

In Which I Return to Blogging

Boy, it's been a long time since I've been here to talk about things other than autism.  This journey as a homeschooling Catholic military family is incredible. 

One of the many things I've been asked in regards to homeschooling has been the socialization.  I never thought I'd be worried about it because well, we are socialized.  My children know how to interact with other people.  They participate in enough activities to have those types of interactions.

However...I never envisioned a world where it would not be enough.  I've had various conversations with my children.  Most of them are lonely.  They feel a lack.  I have one child who craves a friend who might be a kindred spirit along the lines of Anne Shirley of Anne of Green Gables.  I have another who is now starting to notice boys, but she doesn't have a lot of interaction with them.  Her main activity?  Ballet.  There is only one boy in the ballet school and he's like 10.  She doesn't need or necessarily want a boyfriend (she's a bit too young anyway).  She just wants a friend who is a boy (most of my friends in high school were boys so I understand).  This year she expanded her horizons and attended her first CCD class.  Although she didn't learn anything new about her faith, she did meet a lot of new people and that was well worth the time.  She's made friends although one of them is leaving. 

I have one kid who has prayed hard for that one good friend to show up.  This year we are going to be more intentional about his days and include some activities that will hopefully, expose him to lots of new people. 

Friendship.  I've tried to explain to my children that it's something we need to cultivate.  Sometimes you outgrow a friendship.  It's happened to me before.  We are constantly a WIP (Work in Progress to borrow a knitting term).  The lessons learned when a friend leaves our lives can be difficult whether the leaving be physically or emotionally.  My children have also learned that just because you know someone for years does not automatically make them a friend. 

Sometimes you learn that people come back into your lives and your life becomes richer for it.

And, here it is.  My rambling-not-quite-making-sense return to blogging.

 

 

Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday to one of our favorite teens!

Have a blessed day, MadHatter!

Rejoicing with Friends

Lots of rejoicing for new life at Suzanne's and Charlotte's.  Congratulations to these wonderful ladies and their families.  We will be praying.

Beauty and the Beast

We went to the local production of Disney's The Beauty and the Beast. It was a fantastic show with great singing, dance numbers, and sets. A dear friend's three girls were in the show. My three girls gave them each flowers.

Today

A dear friend brought chocolate:

 

Retail therapy:

 

 
 
 

Care Package

A very dear friend sent me a care package to get me through this deployment.  She made me cry.  Ben will tell you it takes quite a bit to do that.  Thank you, Jennifer.  

Do you know how hard it is to get a picture while trying to keep out the mess in the background?